Two years ago, my husband died. Although I have been more at peace this year, I have found that I am still missing him. His diagnosis of metastasis in May, his treatment/decline/and family gathering in June, and his death in July have all made me remember, mourn, and pray. Now my mother is dying. It … Continue reading Death and Life →

I started writing this blog with the idea of chronicling my journey after my husband's death. Sometimes I am moved to write of my life and its events frequently, and sometimes weeks go by with no new writing. Partly, I think, that is because I am going with the flow of my life and am … Continue reading Writing: best intentions →

There is a side of my personality that never grew up. I have given her a name - Carrie. It was my paternal grandmother's nickname, and a name I always wanted to be called. No one ever did that, though. Carrie is eternally 8. I don't really know why that age. It is just a … Continue reading The little girl in me →

There have been times in my life where memes that focus on overcoming and making it through the hard times had great meaning for me. There may still be those times in my future. However, today I want the memes and sayings that celebrate TODAY...Gratefulness...Good things like kind acts...Nature...Beauty. There have been times in my … Continue reading There was a time in my life →

The Old. I still have some old projects that I am working on...well, working on one of the two, that is. After Ed died, I decided to go through all our CDs and sort out the music that I did not enjoy...and pass those on. I made a valiant effort for a couple of months, … Continue reading The old and the new →

When it is as hot as it has been and is going to be around here - temp in high 90s - and the activities for much of the day are indoors in air-conditioning, there is just so much reading, sleeping, and cleaning a gal can do! And, then it hit me. I WAS BORED! … Continue reading Yesterday I was bored. →

This is my birthday month. I am now 71. Sounds old, doesn't it? I don't feel that age much of the time, but I am aware that my body does not have the strength and stamina that it once had. This year, I started the month with two weeks of illness. First, I thought it … Continue reading May: celebrations and struggle →

I have just spent a week fighting a cold...or was it a respiratory virus...no, maybe allergies.  I vacillated between each idea pretty much daily for the past week, choosing my strategy for treatment based on the symptoms and what I had on hand. As of today, I have come down on the side of allergies.  … Continue reading The professional knows →

Today I tackled one of the things that caused me enough fear to keep me from doing it last year. I got the stored stroller and packing boxes down from the ceiling rafters in the shed. Now, why did that scare me? I hate roaches...and there was evidence and dead bodies enough to make me … Continue reading Fear →

I have just finished reading an essay by Neil Gaiman entitled "Ghosts in the Machines: Some Hallowe'en Thoughts". And, it sparked my own thoughts about  my journey, about who I want to be. At different times in my life, I have desired to be a horse, an independent cowboy, a psychologist, a nun, a crone, … Continue reading Spirit, soul, and those ghostly beings →